REAL JOY

Burbank 1948 Evy, me, Jay

The happiest times in my life were my childhood in Burbank and then Fairbanks.  I had food, clothing, and shelter.  I had friends near by to play. I had parents who took care of me and took me to church.  We had treats of huge blueberries, huge vegetables grown in the short growing season, king crab,  fur parkas, and moose running through the neighborhood. 

It was in 4th grade that my struggles began.  Our family moved to a strange new area.  Nobody in our family had ever lived in the southeast. There was no one to explain the cockroaches, humidity, or the formality of the people. I was embarrassed several times by my teacher.  First she asked if I would show the class where Alaska was on the map.  I had no idea where it was.  Then the teacher made an example of me when I tried to draw one picture then tried to cover it up with another drawing using color crayons.  She held it up and told the class to not do what I did. Then when I was just making friends in one neighborhood we moved to another neighborhood and changed schools.  I just couldn't make friends with anybody in my new class. When we all started high school in 8th grade once again there wasn't anybody in my class in my neighborhood.  Finally my sophomore year I made a friend.  Nancy from then on was a good friend.  She even boarded with my parents for student teaching when she was in college. We have kept in touch ever since. 

College was a fun time for me.  My parents footed most of the bill.  I did work at part time jobs and contributed to the expense. I was chosen for several honors on campus, was able to have several different boy friends, and even made friends with sorority sisters who I am still in touch with. I was also able to borrow clothes from friends.  That way I didn't have to go shopping.  It was great that I could eat all meals at the college. No cooking or grocery shopping was necessary.  After interpretive dance practice or practicing with the ROTC Sponsor Corps my appetite wasn't there so I ate small amounts.  Because of that I didn't gain the freshman 15. Another thing I loved about college was that everybody paid attention in class.  High school had been such a drag as all the teachers could do was tell the kids to pay attention and stop talking. Now we know home schooling takes 1/2 to 1/4 the time as the student gets the one on one attention. Another thing I enjoyed about college were the mixers, plays, concerts, and other events right on campus.  It was like a little community separate from the rest of the population. 

When college was about to end for me I fell in love.  The next logical thing to do was to get married.  We planned to buy a boat and sail off into the sunset.  We should have realized that we needed to sign up to crew on a "Tall Ship" or find employment on a tramp steamer.  But we were not very knowledgeable in that area.  We ended up taking normal jobs--  Chris for a daily newspaper and me teaching. Then later kids came along so we needed to bring them up.

That is why I cried out to the Lord in my need. Children are a big responsibility. God helped us.  Our children are exceptional people contributing to society in a very meaningful ways. Then I came down with fibromyalgia. This has put a crimp in many things. But now instead of asking why me I ask why not me.  Through these trials I have come to look to Jesus and He has helped me through difficult times.  I now have real Joy. 

Looking back, I can see that happiness came easily in childhood, but joy—the kind that lasts—was something I found through challenge, change, and faith. The moves, the loneliness, the responsibilities, and even illness all shaped me in ways I could not have understood at the time. What once felt like detours or hardships have become part of a greater story of growth and grace. Today, I am grateful not only for the sweet memories of blueberries and moose in the yard, but also for the struggles that led me to depend on the Lord. In Him, I have found a steady, enduring joy that carries me through every season of life.

II Timothy 1:12  which is why I suffer as I do. But I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that he is able to guard until that day what has been entrusted to me.