FINDING THE PATH

 

African talking drum photo by Chris

It was the 1960s when suddenly bongo playing, poetry reciting, and dressing in the grunge style abounded. It was quite a culture shock for me after moving to EWU on the West Coast from James Madison on the East Coast. At Madison, we weren't allowed to cut across the grass, leave campus without the permission of the Dean of Women, wear shorts or jeans, and had to follow a number of other restrictive rules.

So you can imagine how difficult it was for me to adjust to a completely different college atmosphere. When my boyfriend in Cheney, Washington, told me to wear old clothes, I showed up in culottes and Weejun loafers! Apparently, that broke the camel's back, and he quietly broke up with me. I soon noticed his new girlfriend wearing jeans!

But that was only the beginning of my adjustment to the changing culture of the 1960s.

Then came the onslaught of college boys telling me that all girls would go all the way before marriage. One boyfriend took me to see an R-rated movie, something I had never even been aware of up until that point. Other dates needed to hear the word "no." It was exhausting trying to navigate these new expectations and pressures.

Through it all, I had it in the back of my mind that God required a higher standard of living from me because I was a Christian. The problem was that I really didn't know why I believed what I believed. I couldn't defend my thinking or explain the reasons behind my convictions. So, only by the grace of God, I managed to keep myself sort of pure.

It wasn't until after I was married that I began to ask God to make me interested in studying the Bible. I wanted to understand my faith rather than simply hold on to beliefs I couldn't explain. As I began studying His Word, I learned why I believed what I believed. My faith began to have a foundation, and I could see that God's standards were not just a list of restrictions but were rooted in His love and wisdom.

Later, when fibromyalgia changed what I was able to do for work, I again turned to God and asked Him what He wanted me to do. His answer came to mind: pray and write. That gave me a new direction and a different way to serve Him.

And so, as I continue traveling this path today, I find myself asking God for the same kind of guidance He gave the Israelites in the wilderness. I want Him to provide a pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night, leading me where He wants me to go.

Looking back, I can see that God was leading me even during those years when I didn't fully understand my faith or know what lay ahead. I didn't always recognize His hand at the time, but He was there. Today, I still don't know exactly where the path will lead, but I know whom I am following. My prayer is that I will remain willing to listen, learn, and follow wherever He leads.

__________

Nehemiah 9:19 you in your great mercies did not forsake them in the wilderness. The pillar of cloud to lead them in the way did not depart from them by day, nor the pillar of fire by night to light for them the way by which they should go. 

TO BOO OR NOT TO BOO

 

                                                    Unknown children 1982

As I recall, butterscotch was my least favorite candy when I was a kid. Other than that, I was eager to go trick-or-treating and collect just about every other kind of candy. I had a giant sweet tooth! In fact, I was a trick-or-treat enthusiast all the way into my sophomore year in college.

When I was in high school, I had two little brothers who helped cover for me. I don't recall exactly what happened on Halloween back then, but I'm sure I got to share some of the candy my brothers collected. After all, what are little brothers for?

My enthusiasm for Halloween continued into college. During my sophomore year, we were so poor that we couldn't afford snacks, so we went trick-or-treating! Some nuns invited us in for gingerbread and hot cider, which was a lovely treat. Other times, however, we were scolded because we were supposedly too old for such activities. I guess not everyone appreciated our enthusiasm!

But times have certainly changed. In 1958, the White House distributed Halloween treats to children, including candy and cookies. By 1964, concerns about poisoned treats had become prominent enough to inspire warnings about accepting homemade goodies from strangers. Parents began insisting that treats be commercially packaged and sealed. Homemade treats were often thrown away unless they came from someone the family knew and trusted. What a change from the days when a homemade cookie or caramel apple was a welcome Halloween surprise!

As for costumes, my choice was almost always Peter Pan. My theme was that I would never grow up! I almost managed to stick to that lifestyle until marriage and children came along. While the other girls in high school and college were interested in getting married and starting families, I was interested in avoiding growing up. I guess that explains why several boyfriends eventually broke up with me. I was just a little too immature for their plans!

Today, Halloween has taken on some different forms. Many communities now offer harvest fairs and other family-friendly activities. Some Christians have even returned to celebrating Reformation Day, remembering October 31, 1517, when Martin Luther posted his 95 Theses on the church door in Wittenberg, Germany. I particularly liked one commentator's suggestion: celebrate by nailing 95 Reese's Cups to your door!

I suppose Halloween has changed quite a bit since my childhood days of collecting candy, sharing my brothers' treats, and pretending I would never grow up. We have traded some of the old traditions for new ones, and our concerns about safety have changed how we celebrate. But whether it is trick-or-treating, harvest festivals, or remembering the Reformation, there is still something special about this time of year. And I have to admit, if someone offered me a bag of Halloween candy today, I would probably still be tempted. After all, growing up doesn't necessarily mean giving up your sweet tooth!

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Galatians 5:19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, 21 envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

POUR OUT YOUR HEART

 

The school will soon be silent. All the investigations will be over. The children and teachers will be absent. Families, staff, and the community will mourn. It was another school shooting. Bend, Oregon, will never be the same. How can we begin to understand such evil? Where does it come from?

Is it the result of living in this fallen, sinful, damaged, disordered, afflicted, beleaguered, and only partially redeemed world? Does it begin in the human heart? Or does it grow in the digital worlds of Discord, Reddit, 4Chan, TikTok, and countless other online spaces? As some young people become immersed in these environments, they may be radicalized, dehumanized, and increasingly disconnected from the real people around them. What begins as isolation or anger can become something far more dangerous.

What do we know about those who commit these terrible acts? School shootings are a subset of the broader category of mass shootings.  The Violence Project identified four commonalities among mass shooters, which include a history of trauma, mental health issues, a fascination with violence, and a pattern of concerning behavior prior to the attack. These insights aim to help in understanding and preventing future incidents of mass violence.

These findings do not explain every shooting, nor do they excuse the choices of those who commit such violence. However, they remind us that there may be warning signs, painful experiences, and opportunities for intervention long before a tragedy occurs. We must take those signs seriously and work together to protect vulnerable children.

But how do we protect our children in an increasingly dangerous world? We may need to invest less in the assumption that schools can remain open and welcoming without additional safeguards, and more in alarms, cameras, security measures, and thoughtful planning. Parents may face difficult decisions about where and how their children should be educated. If violence continues to threaten our schools, will we eventually find ourselves trying to protect children inside bulletproof capsules or other forms of extreme security? It is heartbreaking to imagine a world in which such measures seem necessary.

Yet security systems alone cannot heal wounded hearts or remove the evil that leads someone to harm others. We need to care for children who experience trauma, recognize signs of crisis, teach responsible use of technology, and help young people develop meaningful connections with others. Families, schools, communities, and churches all have a role to play.

Can the "evil one" be defeated? We cannot overcome such darkness through human wisdom and strength alone. God can give us the wisdom to recognize danger, the courage to act, and the compassion to care for those who are hurting. Through prayer, we seek His guidance and strength. But prayer must also move us to action—to protect the vulnerable, comfort grieving families, and reach out to those who are struggling before despair turns into destruction.

As Christians, we know that this world is broken, but we also know that evil does not have the final word. Jesus Christ offers hope in the midst of sorrow and light in the darkest places. We may not understand why another school has become a place of mourning, and we cannot promise that tragedy will never happen again. But we can pray, we can act, and we can faithfully teach our children to love their neighbors and value every human life. May God give comfort to the families of Bend, wisdom to those responsible for protecting our children, and healing to a world so desperately in need of Him.

SPIRITUAL GIFTS AND BLESSINGS

 

Jes 5 years old

Children are amazing. Suddenly, you will discover that they are more capable than you thought. Our son Jes was a quiet child. He was a good listener, and he learned quickly. One Sunday, the children were putting on a Christmas play, and the pastor’s wife chose Jes to have a speaking part. I told her that he probably wouldn’t be able to get up and talk in front of the church. She simply told me to leave it to her.

During the play, Jes calmly stood up and spoke his part with no problem. Of course, I beamed with pride! He went on to use this ability many more times throughout his life.

That experience made me think about how God gives each of us abilities that we may not recognize at first. So, how did Jes develop this talent? I believe that God had given him a spiritual gift. I also believe that God, in the person of the Holy Spirit, helps us and teaches us many things. He is God, and He will lead and guide us if we are willing to listen to His voice. Sometimes He speaks to us through Scripture, sometimes through a friend, and sometimes through what feels like a gentle nudge in our hearts.

I have experienced this kind of guidance in my own life.

Recently, a friend and her husband were moving to a new location and would be passing through our area. She wanted to stop by for a quick visit and then stop to see another friend from our long-ago Moms in Prayer group. The only problem was that the phone number we had for our friend had been disconnected.

I e-mailed her, but there was no reply. I called her son-in-law’s church and left a message asking her to call me, but there was still no response. I finally asked God to help us get in touch with her.

Then, quite suddenly, I remembered that years ago I had called her on FaceTime. I looked at the information I had for her in the address book on my phone and noticed the little FaceTime icon. I pressed it—and it rang. She answered!

I was shocked. How did I reach her using an old phone number that she no longer had? We had a wonderful catch-up visit, and she gave me her new phone number. I passed it along to our other friend, who was then able to call her and make arrangements for them to meet.

I believe the Holy Spirit connected that call somehow.

That is only one of many times when I believe I have experienced the Holy Spirit’s guidance in my life. Looking back, I can see occasions when He protected me from choices that might not have been good for me. There were times when a boyfriend suddenly broke up with me, perhaps saving me from a relationship that was not right for me. Most of the young men I dated treated me with respect and were gentlemen. At another important time in my life, a good friend from church started a Moms group where we studied Help! I’m a Parent by Bruce Narramore. That group became an important part of my life.

I have also seen God’s care in circumstances that were completely beyond my control. Even while sailing on the high seas, our vessel was carried safely into harbors. Looking back over the years, I can see many other instances when God was with us, protecting us, guiding us, and giving us abilities we needed at just the right time.

Perhaps that is one of the things I have learned most clearly as I have grown older: God is always at work, even when we don’t recognize what He is doing at the time. The Holy Spirit can use Scripture, other people, circumstances, and even a simple thought that suddenly comes to mind to guide us. We may not always understand why something happens or where a particular nudge is leading, but we can learn to listen.

But the most important gifts given when one asks Jesus into their heart is--  salvation by God's cleansing of our sins, and being sealed for eternity. 

When I look back at Jes standing in front of the church that Christmas morning, I see more than a shy little boy discovering that he could speak. I see a reminder that God has given each of us gifts and abilities, sometimes before we even know we have them. My prayer is that I will continue to listen for His voice, trust His leading, and recognize His hand in the ordinary—and sometimes extraordinary—events of my life.

Ephesians 1:3  Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places,

1952 IN VIRGINIA

Jefferson manor 1952, left to right unknown, unknown, me, Beverly , Rita, Evy 

Grandpa told us the truth. You may ask why I believe my grandfather was correct. He knew the truth about the Communists. As I recall, he wanted to build a fallout shelter in our backyard in Alexandria. I’m not sure how far he got with it. Meanwhile, we had “duck and cover” drills at school every so often. We would hear an alarm and be instructed to climb under our desks and cover our heads with our hands. All of this was supposed to protect us from the threat of the “bomb” during the Cold War—a time when the United States and the Soviet Union were locked in a tense struggle.

In America, some people went overboard in their efforts to keep Communism out of the United States. Others understood that the answer went much deeper than politics. Richard Wurmbrand, for example, knew that Jesus was the answer. He was tortured and imprisoned in Romania for fourteen years because of his faith.

Wurmbrand believed Soviet Communism was a fundamentally atheistic and oppressive system. In his 1966 testimony before the U.S. Senate, he described his experiences preaching to Russian soldiers and warned that Communist systems would ultimately become oppressive when Communists gained complete power.

Looking back, the defeat of Soviet Communism came about through many influences—economic decline, the prayers and persistence of free people, the witness of Christians like Wurmbrand, and many other forces working against that system.

And that brings me to today. Once again, we hear promises that the government can provide for everyone and that a peaceful, prosperous utopia can be created if only we put enough power in the right hands. But history reminds us to be cautious about such promises. Human government cannot create the perfect world we long for.

As Christians, we know that true peace and justice ultimately come from God. We are called to love our neighbors, care for one another, help those in need, and live responsibly—not simply look to government to solve every problem. Grandpa understood something important: freedom is precious, government has limits, and no earthly system can take the place of God.

Hebrews 13:3  Remember those who are in prison, as though in prison with them, and those who are mistreated, since you also are in the body.

HOME

 

Grandpa Roy and Grandma Grace Belle 1913

“Joyce never forgot what Joe had gone through in his early years, and she never wavered from a vow she had made to herself early in their relationship: come what may, she would make sure he never went through anything like it again, would never again be abandoned, would always have a warm and loving home.”
—The Boys in the Boat by Daniel James Brown

Home is so important in a person’s life, yet the work of building a home can be tedious and often goes unnoticed. Joyce had never planned to be a housewife or to spend her days keeping house. But because she loved Joe, she willingly did the work. She wanted him to feel secure. She wanted him to know that, whatever happened, he had a place where he was loved and would not be abandoned.

That reminded me of Grandma and Grandpa. They, too, built a home together—not simply a house, but a place where their three daughters could grow, learn, and develop their own gifts.

My mom remembered her dad teaching her older sister and her to type. He supervised their practice, making sure they learned to do it well. Grandma stood beside the piano for their piano practice helping them keep time. Those girls became typists and piano and organ players, and they continued those activities throughout their lives.

Grandma also found practical ways to care for her daughters. When my mom studied late at night, Grandma would heat a brick in the wood-stove oven, wrap it carefully, and put it at my mom’s feet to keep them warm. It was a simple thing, but it was an expression of love. The youngest daughter took voice lessons and developed a love of singing that stayed with her throughout her life.

In those days, building a home was not something that happened by itself. It took time, work, sacrifice, patience, and love. Grandma and Grandpa invested those things in their family, and eventually their three daughters left home to build homes of their own.

Yet leaving home was not always easy, nor was it always possible. Tragic circumstances like my great uncle dying at a young age and leaving a deaf wife and a baby.  In those days deafness was treated differently than it is today.  The family took the baby to raise and sent the mom away. The unmarried brother and sister remained at home.  In my own family my sister and 3 brothers were reluctant to move out on their own.  Eventually they did so. 

And so the story continued from one generation to the next: people leaving one home and trying to create another. Houses were built, children were raised, skills were taught, and traditions were passed along. Through it all, the ordinary, sometimes tedious work of making a home continued.

Today, however, the idea of marriage and family seems to be changing. Many women are delaying marriage and family, and some are freezing their eggs so they can have children when they are older. According to a December 9, 2025, Washington Post report, young men today are, surprisingly, more interested in marriage than young women. The article suggested that this growing difference between the sexes could contribute to social chaos.

Perhaps part of the reason for the reluctance to marry is the message women have received for decades: that they can—and should—have it all. They can pursue a career, build a home, raise children, and somehow manage all of it without having to make difficult choices or sacrifices.

But can we really have it all?

Maybe the better question is: What is it that we value most? A career can be rewarding, and accomplishments outside the home certainly have value. But a loving home does not happen without someone investing time and energy in it. Joyce understood that. Grandma understood it. They knew that making a home was work, but they also knew that the work mattered.

Perhaps we have underestimated the importance of that work. A warm meal, a clean and welcoming house, a piano lesson supervised, a brick warmed in a wood stove, a child encouraged, a husband welcomed home—these may seem like small things. Yet those small things can become the very fabric of a family’s life.

A home is built one act of love at a time. And while building one may not always be glamorous, the security, memories, and love created there can last for generations.

Proverbs 31:10   An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. 11 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. 12 She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.    

11  and h

I'M STANDING UP ON THE INSIDE

 

No safety back in the day.

Years ago, our son, Jes, and our future daughter-in-law, Jessica, had the responsibility of picking up someone from the airport for the wedding of their friend. They were surprised when they met the group from Japan and discovered that they had no car seat for their four-year-old. After getting the child safely to their friend's house, Jes and Jessica promptly went out and bought a car seat. They respected the law and wanted to obey it—not simply because it was the law, but because they knew it was intended for the child's safety.

That story reminds me of another story I heard years ago. A little girl was standing up on the seat in the car. Her mother insisted that she sit down and put on her seat belt. After some quick discussion, the girl finally submitted. But then she said, "I'm still standing up on the inside."

Isn't that sometimes how we are? We may obey outwardly while our hearts are still resisting.

I am very blessed to live in the United States and to have the freedom we have here. We can express our opinions and speak our minds as long as our speech is peaceful. Yet freedom does not mean that everything we choose to do is necessarily good for us or for those around us.

As I look at our culture today, I sometimes feel as though the young people are repeating some of the attitudes of the 1970s. Ugly is in, and language that once would have shocked us has become commonplace. Tattoos are now so normal that someone without tattoos can sometimes be the one who stands out. Yet customs and standards vary greatly from one part of the world to another. In some areas of Tanzania, for example, tattoos are considered far more serious than we might imagine—some even viewing them as worse than adultery.

These differences remind me that what our culture accepts is not always the same as what is best for us. And underneath all these outward expressions is something we all have in common: there is a little bit of rebellion in every one of us.

It is difficult to walk the straight path when there is so much noise surrounding us. We want to have friends. We want to fit in. We want to enjoy life. Sometimes one small step away from what is good seems harmless, but that one step can make the next step easier—and before long, we can find ourselves farther from the path than we ever intended to be.

So how do we live the best life? How do we continue walking in the right direction when making the effort becomes tiring? Sometimes it may seem almost useless to keep trying. We are running the marathon of this life, and we can become weary from the effort.

But there is Good News!

God does not ask us to run this race in our own strength. When we ask Him, He will indwell us with the power of His Holy Spirit. He helps us recognize what is right, gives us strength when we are weak, and draws us back when we begin to wander. Through His Word and His people, He teaches us how to keep walking the straight path.

Perhaps the goal isn't simply to make sure we are sitting down on the outside. God wants to change what is happening on the inside as well. We don't have to remain "standing up on the inside." Through His grace, He can change our hearts so that our outward obedience becomes an expression of an inward desire to follow Him.

And when we stumble—and we will—we don't have to give up. We can get back on the path, ask for His help, and keep running the race. The Good News is that we don't run it alone.

I Kings 19:18 "...Yet I will leave seven thousand in Israel, all the knees that have not bowed to Baal, and every mouth that has not kissed him.”