LOVE AND HATE

 

Grandpa Claude 1879

Are babies born good and have to be taught to be bad, or are they born bad and have to be taught to be good? This question has been debated for centuries, and it confronts us almost as soon as a child enters the world. From the very beginning, we notice differences. Some children are strong-willed and demand their own way, while others are more compliant, cheerful, and agreeable. These variations suggest that temperament is partly inherited. Yet regardless of personality, each person must learn how to rise above mere instinct and overcome the pull of their own genes.

To understand this tension more clearly, it helps to look at the Christian perspective. Christian theology holds two truths at the same time. On the one hand, humans are made in God’s image—good and valuable. On the other hand, humans are fallen—morally broken. Because both are true, babies can be understood in a particular way.

They are innocent in experience, but not morally complete. They do not need to be taught how to sin, but they do need to be taught how to love well. In other words, goodness must be nurtured, shaped, and guided.

From here, the role of culture becomes impossible to ignore. Just as families shape a child, so do societies. The culture into which a child is born powerfully influences what that child learns about love, fear, and loyalty. Unfortunately, some societies pass along hatred instead of compassion.

History offers sobering examples. For generations, Catholics and Protestants in Ireland were taught to hate one another. That legacy caused deep wounds, though thankfully much of that hostility is now being overcome. In a different context, some Palestinian Authority–approved textbooks have contained material that demonizes Jews, glorifies violence, or erases Israel. These practices have been criticized by international monitors, including the EU and independent education review groups. At the same time, it is important to recognize that not every Palestinian child is taught hatred, and many parents, teachers, and NGOs actively resist such messaging. ( See Rawan Osman blog.)/

By contrast, Jewish children are not taught to hate Muslims. Within Judaism, teaching hatred toward another people or religion runs counter to core Jewish values. This contrast highlights a crucial truth: hatred is learned and reinforced—or challenged—by what a culture chooses to teach.

The United States provides its own illustration. Even today, old regional stereotypes linger. In the South, some once said, “They swear like a Yankee,” while in the North many assumed the South was defined by racial hatred. These ideas grew out of real historical events, but over time they hardened into sweeping judgments. Scripture reminds us that sin and virtue are matters of the heart, not geography. When we trade truth for caricature, we fail to see one another as God does.

Taken together, these examples point to a sobering conclusion. Children must be taught to love. Hatred comes naturally, but love does not flourish without guidance. As Scripture tells us in I John 4:8, “Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.”

So we return to the opening question: Are babies born good and taught to be bad, or born bad and taught to be good? The answer is not a simple either–or. We are born bearing God’s image, yet marked by a fallen nature. From our earliest days, we are capable of self-interest, fear, and division—but we are also capable of great goodness when love is modeled and taught. Left on their own, children do not naturally grow into love; they must be shown what it looks like, practiced in it, and corrected when they fall short. This is why families, churches, and cultures matter so deeply. Love must be intentionally taught, patiently lived, and faithfully passed on, because God Himself is love—and to know Him is to learn how to love.

TRUTH

Mt Eagle elementary Alexandria, VA 1953

When we were in the 4th grade in 1953 we ran relay races during recess. I could run faster than Buddy Huddle, (who was the tallest boy in our class.) For some reason, I believed that I could outrun anybody. I was fast.

That confidence stayed with me for years—until reality intervened.

It was the summer of 1960 or 1961 when I challenged my cousin Richard S. to a foot race and was sadly defeated. In that moment, reality sat in. I could no longer outrun the boys.

That childhood lesson raises a much larger question. If I could be so convinced of something that later proved untrue, how often do we deceive ourselves about other things?

So why have so many been deceived? Even some M.D.’s or Supreme Court Justices can no longer define male and female. Why are so many confused about so many things these days? At the heart of all this confusion is a deeper issue: how do we define “truth”?

The answer is simple, though not always easy. All we have to do is look to God. And how do we do that? By reading the Bible.

Of course, some object at this point. They look at the Old Testament and say we can no longer obey those laws because they are outdated. But have they read the New Testament? In the New Testament, God rescinded some of the laws by sending a vision to Peter (Acts 10:10–16). At the same time, Scripture is clear that the moral laws of the Old Testament remain the same, as explained in Romans 1.

This confusion about truth is not limited to theology. The media is guilty of slanting the news to align with preferred political beliefs. With AI and competing worldviews, how do you figure out who to believe? The answer remains the same: if it aligns with the Bible, it is true; if it contradicts the Bible, it is false.

And how do we know what the Bible says? We read it. We study it.

Some people believe they are doing good by fighting the government, a political party or attacking the media. But are they really doing good? It depends. How are they doing the fighting?

Dietrich Bonhoeffer took on the German government by starting a seminary and educating young men in what God has told us. Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn confronted evil through speeches and writing. He said, “If I were asked today to formulate as concisely as possible what was the main cause of the ruinous revolution that swallowed up some 60 million of our people, I could not put it more accurately than to repeat: ‘Men had forgotten God; that is why all this has happened.’”

His words serve as a warning. When we forget God, falsehood follows.

The truth is this: the Bible is true. We should read it. We should study it.

Looking back, that race with my cousin was a gift. It taught me that confidence alone does not determine reality. I believed I was the fastest—until the truth caught up with me. In much the same way, our culture can convince itself it is right, enlightened, or progressing, yet still be running in the wrong direction. Truth does not change to match our beliefs; we must change to align with the truth. Just as I could no longer outrun reality on that summer day, none of us can outrun God’s truth. The only wise choice is to stop, look to Him, and run the race according to His Word.

Revelation 22:11 Let the evildoer still do evil, and the filthy still be filthy, and the righteous still do right, and the holy still be holy.”

LIFE

 

Mexico 1999 with Nancy and Charlie 

On a sunny day in Mexico back in 1999, we—along with our friends Charlie and Nancy—stepped into a small store where masks were made out of leather. Almost immediately, our imaginations took over. We pictured ourselves attending a masquerade ball, laughing at the whimsy of it all. Before long, we were laughing at ourselves. Still, just in case that imagined evening ever became reality, we bought a few masks and carried them home as a reminder of that playful moment.

That sense of play has always mattered deeply to me. Looking back, it has woven itself through every stage of my life. In high school, it showed up in drama club, journalism, and youth group. Later, in college, it took the form of modern dance club and ROTC Sponsor Corps. Each season brought its own version of creativity, movement, and shared experience.

As life unfolded into marriage, that same spirit simply took on new expressions. Children, church, the United States Power Squadron, Moms in Prayer, traveling around the world, and sailing on the high seas all became part of the adventure. From the beginning, I wanted a life marked by exploration, and by the grace of God, that is exactly what I have been given. I will never be a scholar, nor did I aspire to be a career women —and that is perfectly okay. Instead, I find myself content now to write, to pray, and to discover adventure within a purposely smaller, quieter area of life.

And so, with that spirit, welcome to the New Year 2026. Great things God has done and will do.

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“This does not mean that we are to be perpetually solemn. We must play. But our merriment must be of that kind (and it is, in fact, the merriest kind) which exists between people who have, from the outset, taken each other seriously—no flippancy, no superiority, no presumption.”
—C. S. Lewis

GIFTS

 

Rita Lorraine 

Christmas is a time of joy, goodwill, and the giving of gifts—gifts for which we use our God-given time and money. During this season, we decorate our homes with twinkling lights and Nativity scenes. We bake cookies and make candy, hang our stockings, and try to be good for goodness’ sake.

Yet beyond these familiar traditions, there are other gifts God has given—gifts not wrapped in paper or ribbon. One such example is Beethoven, who became world-famous because of his gifting and dedication. Some of his contemporaries claimed he was less precise as a performer, especially later in life. His worsening deafness likely affected ensemble playing and timing, and he was known to take expressive liberties in performance, which some listeners interpreted as poor rhythm. Nevertheless, he ultimately devoted himself to composing, and God gave him the gift to excel in that calling.

In much the same way, music has been a gift woven throughout my own family. Many musicians have gone before me and are coming behind me. My beloved Aunt Ruth and Uncle Jack sang for me when I was five years old. I had requested they sing, “I said my pajamas and put on my prayers.” My mom and my Aunt Evelyn would also play for us.

Grace and Evelyn

As the years went on, my sister and all three brothers took part in bands. Our daughter and son played in bands as well, and cousins were involved in the music scene. We were blessed by a granddaughter playing in several bands also. Among them all, however, it was my mother-in-law who rose to particular fame. Rita practiced eight hours a day as a child, and God gave her remarkable ability. She played for many years in Jim Baker’s dance band, on a radio show called Rita Lorraine and Her Magic Violin, and in the Spokane Symphony.

Ultimately, God gives good gifts to us because we are created in His image, and we bring glory to Him when we develop those gifts. Still, the greatest gift of all surpasses every talent and tradition: the gift of God coming down in human form—Jesus—Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6).

ENGLISH IDENTITY

 

Aunty and Beanie's houses photo by Chris

Aunty and Beanie, my great aunt and great uncle, were “English.” All their ancestors can be traced back to England, and in many ways they carried that heritage with them. When I think of them, their houses—pictured in the photo above—seem to capture the spirit of the Pilgrims who emigrated to America in 1620. The Pilgrims primarily built their homes using wood such as oak, pine, and walnut, following traditional English methods. Their earliest dwellings often had thatched roofs, although clapboards later replaced them for better fire safety.

In the same way their homes reflected tradition, Aunty and Beanie themselves lived out many English traits. For example, they were wonderful gardeners. Uncle Beanie tended a huge lilac bush beside his house, while Aunty grew vegetables and a lovely bush of wild roses. It always seemed to me that many English people are dedicated gardeners, and they certainly were.

Beyond their gardens, Uncle Beanie was a natural caregiver. So it usually fell to him to entertain the cousins when we were visiting Grandma and Grandpa on their 15-acre farm in Eastern Washington. Whether he was taking us on long walks or escorting us down the hill to the mailboxes to wait for the mail, he always made us feel cared for.

Aunty, on the other hand, seemed happiest with babies. I remember her rocking one or two little ones at a time. My brother Jay, the first grandchild, bonded with her deeply, and they always enjoyed one another’s company.

Because of distance, we never spent Thanksgiving with them while we were growing up; our visits were usually limited to the summer. However, that changed later. When three of us attended college nearby, we finally had the chance to spend Thanksgiving with them and with other relatives in town. One year my brother Jay wanted to enjoy every Thanksgiving invitation he received, so he managed to eat Thanksgiving dinner at the college, at our grandparents’ farmhouse, and at our aunt and uncle’s home in town.

Looking back, I’m thankful that our ancestors emigrated to America and that we have such a rich heritage.

Psalm 119:111 — “Your testimonies are my heritage forever, for they are the joy of my heart.”

IT'S VETERANS DAY

 

Our active duty veteran--  Josh

Today is a day to honor veterans. We have an active duty veteran in our family—Josh—married to our granddaughter Samantha. We are very proud of him and grateful for his service.

On Sunday, our church recognized veterans in a touching tribute, and now, throughout Spokane, various events are taking place to honor them once again. It’s wonderful to see our community come together in appreciation. If you’re local, check out this website for details. Even “Play It Again Sports” in the Spokane Valley, 15412 East Sprague Avenue, Suite 12, is hosting a special event today—what a great way to see different groups show support.

As I reflect on all this, I’m filled with gratitude. I deeply admire these brave men and women and am thankful we have a day set aside to honor them.

Thinking back, I’m reminded of my own small connection to military life. Many years ago, when I attended EWU, I was an ROTC Sponsor and even served as the honorary colonel, commander of the Sponsor Corps. Those were exciting days—marching in parades, attending “Rifle Meets,” and supporting the cadets at various events. We Sponsors were proud to play a part in encouraging these dedicated future officers.

Back then, before women could officially join as officers, one of the few ways we could be recognized was by running for Military Ball Queen. Below are photos of the queen candidates from 1966—a cherished memory and a reminder of how times have changed.

It truly was a fun and meaningful time to be part of the ROTC community. I'm thankful for it. 

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.”
— James 1:17

IT ISN'T SAD MOVIES THAT MAKE ME CRY-- IT'S NEW TECHNOLOGY

 

Mad scientist

My wonderful family wants me to have the best of everything. Unfortunately, that often involves change — and change is not my strong suit.

This weekend, for example, my beloved iPhone 6s was pried out of my hands (with my reluctant approval) and replaced with a shiny new 16e. I know, I know — progress is good. But as soon as I start getting comfortable with one gadget, another upgrade appears on the horizon.

As if that weren’t enough, our Select Comfort king bed also got an upgrade — adjustable mattresses this time. It’s not that I dislike these improvements; it’s just that my brain doesn’t adapt as quickly as the technology does.

Take my nighttime podcast routine. It used to be so simple: grab my wired earbuds, plug in, and listen. Now, it’s an entire production. I have to fish my fancy wireless earbuds out of their little case, twist them the right way, and somehow get them into my ears — all in the dark. Half the time, I’m not sure if they’re even on.

Then I remember — there’s always help nearby. When all else fails, I can just ask ChatGPT.

Because as Ecclesiastes 3 reminds us:

“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.”

Maybe this is my season to learn — slowly, reluctantly, but with a little laughter along the way.